I'd rather admire someone

i'd rather admire someone than being someone's gf. i'm fifteen and still love to have fun with people. i'd rather hang out with friends instead of take a date with a guy i loved. yes, i'm a girl. i love a guy, i like their face, their personality, their laugh.yes, i admire a guy.

i admire him. i love the way he runs, i love the way he laugh, i love the way he fell down (and i'll laugh out even louder). but once he ask something serious just like last night, all i have to do is think hard. i've promised to myself that i only can get a bf on my seventeen. i have a principle that when we tie a relationship ropes between us, i have to be serious through it. even though that was too serious remembering that i'm on my fifteen (ok, you can laugh now. i was too exaggerate), i don't wanna see the relationship as a game that we can playing and cheating at. i mean, when we live through the relationship and you think that we can broke up sometimes but not now and then you'll be looking for your new gf/bf, and do it all over again for the umpteenth time until someone propose you in the future and you finally married. i don't wanna be like that. i want a long-lasting relationship, that's why i'm still being a single lady right now. blah.

maybe my standards were too high to reach, but i'm perfectionist.

in this case, i'm talking about him and our last night occasion. that was pretty cool. even though i knew that he loves me before, but still! he ask me with his usual joke and somewhatssss, it drives me crazy. i was confused that time. do i have to stand on my principle or not? i mean, i love him too, but i'm pretty sure that if we do the relationship, we'll act different and upside down. he'll be nicer and will often praise me. you'll think that it's even better, but i even do love him when we were bickering at each other. when he was mocking at me and stuck his tongue out to me. yes, i'm weird, but it's a fact, guys.

and i decided to save his question last night for the right time. i don't know when the right time is, but i know that my answer should be 'yes'. so be patient, boy. you know i love you more :D

lots of love and friendship,


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